Do you consider some people in your life to be enemies?
Maybe these are people that, in a sense, “hold you back”?
Like, if they weren’t in your life, things would be much better.
You’d have the motivation to push your business forward, make those sales, and finally have some peace of mind.
These are people who probably trigger you in ways no one else does.
They just irritate you in ways words can’t describe.
You may be disgusted by their behavior.
Every time you see them, you feel uncomfortable, and maybe even become downright angry.
Deep down inside, you may even hate them.
Well, if that’s the case, you’re probably not going to like hearing what I’m about to say.
At first, you probably won’t agree with it.
May think I’m out of my mind for even suggesting it.
But, if you take what I say into consideration, and actually reflect on it, you’ll probably realize that there’s some truth to it.
Ready?
Here it is..
What I want to say is that these people that piss you off so much are your life’s greatest gifts.
Yes. You read that right.
Life’s greatest gifts.
And, you should treasure them accordingly.
I mean, really.
Be utterly grateful of their presence in your life.
Why?
Well, if you allow it, these personal relationships can reveal some deep unconscious parts of your own yourself.
Important parts.
Parts that make YOU hold your own self back.
See, if there’s certain aspects of another individual that annoy you, chances are, they’re aspects that you yourself have.
The truth is, these emotional triggers are telling us which parts of ourselves we’re unsatisfied with.
The negative traits we often dislike about others are usually traits we don’t like about ourselves.
Being that we see these traits as something “bad”, we push them away from our conscious attention.
Our mental self-defense system, the ego, can’t have us thinking a part of us is “bad”.
So, it does its thing and hides these parts of ourselves from our self.
“Whatever is rejected from the self, appears in the world as an event.”
– Carl Jung
Well, being that everyone we meet is our “mirror” to some degree, we see these so-called negative traits manifested in the behavior of others.
Ever heard the analogy of pointing a finger to blame someone, but having three pointed back at you?
When we haven’t fully accepted ourselves for who we are, we tend to judge and criticize those very same aspects of ourselves that we’ve shunned away in other people.
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
– Carl Jung
This is one of the many marvels of the unconscious.
No matter how much we reject or avoid something, we can never completely escape it.
We simply cannot run, nor hide, from our problems.
Until we dive head-first and deal with them, they will direct our lives in ways unimaginable, and we’ll call it “fate”.
It may very well be the most difficult thing we do – and that’s probably why we keep ourselves from doing it.
“People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own souls. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”
– Carl Jung
The most empowering thing to do when we find ourselves triggered is to take a step back and really self-reflect.
Do I behave like this anywhere in my own life?
Have I behaved like this before?
What is this person teaching me that I need to learn in order to become a more complete individual?
Forgiveness doesn’t come naturally for most.
But, forgiving – both yourself and others – is the most effective way to disengage from the negative behaviors to give ourselves a chance to reflect.
Truly, one of the most terrifying things in life is to accept oneself completely.
If we can find the courage to dive into our own darkness, we can realize that there are incredible insights to learn and grow from.
Making the unconscious parts of ourselves conscious, we’re better able to manage ourselves.
As a results, we’re better able to manage the darkness that exists in the world.
At the end of the day, we’re all perfectly imperfect human beings who long for happiness and peace of mind.
Everyone hopes for a brighter world.
A safer world.
One with harmony and justice.
The only thing that stops us from creating this world is the things we’ve considered nasty.
The parts we’ve pushed away and neglected.
These parts are our deepest wounds – wounds our ego has hidden from us.
“How can I be substantial if I do not cast a shadow? I must have a dark side also If I am to be whole.”
– Carl Jung